Author: najma

I am a mother of three, born and bred in Mombasa, Kenya. I am passionate about books, writing, healthy living and getting people to see the best of themselves. Especially getting people to see the best of themselves.

Stepping Into Your Pain

Recently, I have had a series of disappointments. Some were life changing while some, Allah willing, I know I am going to get over them in a day or two.

Before, it used to be that my usual reaction to life’s bombshells is to crawl somewhere and deny what is going on to my heart’s content.

I will pretend none of it is happening and then I will promptly make some tea because you know……….tea and chocolate cake makes everything instantly better 🙂

Of course, the adult me will indulge the scared little girl for a few hours or days if needs be and then she will put on her big girl hijab and take matters into her own hands.

As someone once said: if you want a different result from the one you have been getting you need to take a different set of actions. So I thought to myself why not take a different approach to dealing with adversity and disappointment?

I don’t consider myself a control freak. It used to be that when things don’t work out the way I had hoped or planned for them to, I would sit and dissect the matter from every angle. I would apportion blame to the relevant parties, myself included. And then I would throw a civilised, grown up tantrum.

Learning to release outcomes is something I am teaching myself every day. Didn’t get the ‘deal of a lifetime?’ No biggie. Allah has planned something better for me. Child did not get into the school we had applied to?

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Take It From Me

You will miss their messiness; and you will not even mind the crayon art they made on your walls. You will miss them flooding the bathroom and saying they did not do it. You will miss breaking up their fights and playing judge and jury to their never ending sibling 'court' cases. You will miss shouting for the nth time for them to turn off the lights or else! And you will miss their moodiness and their one word answers.

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