What Baggage Will You Be Leaving Behind in 2022?

Uuuughhh.

Life can get messy when you have so much baggage.

I mean turned upside down inside out messy.

Like unrecognisable messy.

And when that happens you have no choice but to stop, take stock and plan. See what baggage you are carrying around that isn’t yours to carry anymore.

You know life doesn’t wait for the new year to happen.

İt just happens.

I know a new year signals a fresh start.

Which is why we so often make resolutions to do better in the coming months than we have done in the previous.

And we say things like ‘I am going to lose weight; read more books; show up for prayers on time; cut down on my screen time.’

I say why wait for a random date on the calendar to shake up your life towards a better direction?

Any change begins in the mind you know.

Before you undertake anything it is first your mindset that needs to undergo some cleaning.

Because it is our mindset that keeps us stuck where we are.

Once we decide that perhaps we need to look at things differently we will be amazed at what garbage and baggage we have been holding on to.

Simply because we didn’t realise we could do better.

When we take an honest look at our lives we will find that there is a lot that needs kicking out:

Relationships that have stretched past their expiration dates.

It might seem callous or heartless to suggest that you cut loose certain people; to suggest that certain relationships need to go but (you do) and they do.

İf you are to start afresh, breathe easier, move forward with more spring in your step then you must cut the cord to relationships that do you more harm than good.

I understand our reluctance [to let go of some of the people in our lives] because they are after all living breathing humans and not plastic or trash.

But if we look with a close honest eye we find that the more we hang on to them the more hurt and anger we hold on to.

We are not meant to be friends with everyone and neither can we get along with every person we share our lives with.

İndeed, most of the relationships we hold on to we do so because of duty.

And mostly because we have invested so much time in them we are loath to release them.

There is nothing left but strained conversations, double meaning, thinly veiled sarcasm, and awkward silences.

Sometimes a trip to the dentist is less stressful. There is nothing left but empty platitudes and perfunctory hugs.

Letting go of certain people in our lives is, without a doubt, going to be excruciatingly hard but for our survival and peace of mind it is necessary.

We hang on to marriages that died in their third year in the hope that with the next child things will look up and show promise of better days to come.

Only, several GRANDchildren later and you are no more getting along with your spouse or your in-laws then you were when you were a young elation filled bride.

A lifetime wasted.

I know of ladies whose husbands kicked them out (and did them the favour they could not do themselves) after almost forty years of marriage.

We hang on to ‘friendships’ that do not deserve to be called that.

Where we are the ones doing all the reaching out, the planning and the supporting. Where we are the ones always available, cheering them on their wins and where they walk all over us and our dreams and ambitions.

We need to say NEXT! and move on.

Old outdated usually harmful beliefs

These could be beliefs about wealth and abundance; they could about people and about life in general.

İ always wonder at how we can keep on insisting that life is hard and then hope all will go well for us.

Life is 10 percent what happens to us and 90 percent how we react to what happens to us.

If we want to see change we must first be willing to look within and see what beliefs hold us back:

Do you believe all people are dishonest and therefore you cannot trust anyone?

Or perhaps you believe all women are gold diggers and all men serial cheaters?

Do you believe there is never enough money for you but plenty for everyone else?

Do you believe remembering all that you need to remember to complete your formal ‘education’ is a monumental task that is impossible to achieve?

These outdated beliefs (if they ever were relevant in the first place) are some of the baggage that we need to let go off to see progress and change.

We need to let go of the stuff that clutters our homes and physical spaces.

I know of several people who have knicknacks from the early 1970s.

The reason we hold on to stuff that cost us so much of our resources is exactly that. We have paid so much for them in terms of money and attention and time, we feel it’s wasteful to throw it out.

We don’t have to throw out these things. All we have to do is pass them on to someone else who will genuinely appreciate and put them to good use.

Alternatively we can donate them to a good cause where they can either be sold or used as well.

Hanging on to stuff, buying stuff is not only a drain on our financial resources but they are a drain of our physical resources not to mention the toll they have on the environment.

More unnecessary baggage.

Now with online shopping we have even more access to stuff out there. With a click of a mouse or the touch of a key packages arrive at our doorsteps in less than a week.

Why not embrace the ‘less is more’ adage?

 

‘Careers’ or jobs that generate more ill health than income.

We all know of that one person who will complain all the way about how much he hates his job, his racist boss, the commute, his deadbeat co-workers and yet will stay there for fifteen plus years.

It never occurs to him that, perhaps, there is always a choice. For as long as we are alive and not in prison somewhere, then we have a choice.

While work and jobs will always have their challenges as do most things in life, work and jobs do not have to be punishment for our sins, they do not have to throw our weaknesses at us on a daily basis.

While “don’t quit” might seem an honourable policy to live by, not quitting a job that makes you miserable, gives you ulcers, shakes your mental equilibrium and leaves you in pitiful self doubt because you have bills to pay is a course in death by slow torture.

Staying in a career you have no affinity for simply because it is what is expected of you is a wastage of your precious life.

We need to (wo)man up and take charge. Stop saying the economy is down I need this job. Have faith that you will find a better one. Perhaps this is a sign that you should go start something you have always wanted to start.

 

Let go of believing every one else is responsible but you.

It is the fault of the elected official your parents the neighbours your spouse anyone but yourself.

What is wrong with the world today is everyone’s fault but ours. The economy, the environment, the education system the state of our youth today we all have a say whether we choose to believe it or not.

Taking responsibility is the first step to a better life for yourself. You are responsible for your own life and for the choices you make.

Medieval cruel inhumane standards of “beauty”

Like threading, bleaching, mkorogo (a deadly mix of bleaching agents) dangerous diet pills, hair colouring with toxic chemicals decoration with the former aka piko.

This deserves a whole blog post in itself. The lengths  women go to in the name of beauty or being thin or keeping up with whatever is trending is heart breaking to say the least.

The trauma, the low self esteem, our young girls do not need this garbage or baggage.

We must give a vehement NO to these and advocate for safer and more positive images for our young girls.

 

When taking a trip we are always careful not to exceed the baggage allowance as we don’t want the stress and inconvenience of being in excess.

Who wants to pay for the same or unpack and switch things around from suitcase to suitcase at the airport check in?

Yet we carry baggage from year to year, bogged down by the weight, paying for it in terms of health and time and mental energy. When we could do so much better.

 

So. What will you be leaving behind in 2022?

 

 

 

 

 

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clutter, difficult conversations, doing better, fresh starts, Harmful beliefs, letting go, mindset change, New Year, simpler life, toxic relationships


najma

I am a mother of three, born and bred in Mombasa, Kenya. I am passionate about books, writing, healthy living and getting people to see the best of themselves. Especially getting people to see the best of themselves.

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